Merry Christmas

Happy Christmas, everyone! I hope all of you had a good holiday and got everything your heart desired. This year Christmas was (relatively) quiet. Carrie and Clint and Lauren were in Colorado, Melissa and Adam and all the kids were in Texas, Shannon and Clark were . . . well, just across town. But they weren't there on Christmas morning so it was just Jessica and I as far as "kids" go. Meme left at lunchtime to drive to Boise with Brady so all of the Wycherlys could be together.

We, as ever, made out like bandits on Christmas morning - despite Dad's constant insistence that Christmas would be smaller this year. The biggest Christmas surprise of all was a PS2 for the family and Guitar Hero II for me! I honestly thought they'd never go for that. I think I'm already developing a blister.

Elliott was very sweet and got me a Far Side book, an Eddie Izzard DVD, and a DVD of Pirates of the Caribbean 2. We saw Pirates on our first date, so I thought that was extra nice. I'm not sure if he did that on purpose, or just because I like pirates a lot. Bonus points, either way.

Shannon and Clark got me sock monkey slippers, so here is a picture. As promised to Melissa.

In other exciting news, Dad has signed us up for high speed internet, so next time I post pictures on this blog it won't take half an hour. Woo!

This is me.

Thanks, Adam!

Holy Crap, People!

Once again, Clark has taken the words right out of my mouth. ESPN's coverage last night of the Las Vegas Bowl was the absolute worst piece of sportscasting I have ever seen, and I spent this season watching the mtn, people.

Come on!

ESPN, largely regarded as the paragon of sport broadcasting - the first all-sports network, now many many sports networks and websites and magazines and such - spent the entire game talking about anything except the game. There was actually a time in the second half when they were talking about Brent Mussburger's Rocky II action figure with (retired UNLV basketball) Coach Tarkanian when one of the broadcasters said, as an aside, "Oh, and that was a completion."

The hell?! Where is my football game?

Adding insult to injury, not only were they totally ignoring the game up in the booth, but they weren't even showing the game. For minutes on end, all you would see were the guys in the booth and whatever irrelevant person they were there talking with. It's pretty sad when the best commentary on the game is provided by a retired basketball coach. Whom they were trying to interview about Bobby Knight.

Argh. Hulk smash!

Okay, sure. This was not a real barn-burner of a game. The officiating was genuinely retarded, with officials having the difference between "defense" and "offense" pointed out to them, very gently, by John Beck. This did not warrant commentary from the booth. Heck, at one point the ref tried to issue a penalty "half the distance to the foul." Um, no. I may be just a girl, but I know that ain't right. Did they comment on the fact that BYU was playing against their former head coach, Gary Crowton? Barely. Have anything to say about Oregon's bizarrely crappy offense? No. Repeated fights breaking out on the field? Nah. But let's make sure we talk about West Texas A&M's golf coach, for cry eye!

(Yes, I know he's Oregon's quarterback's brother. I still don't care. Maybe you should talk about the Leaf actually playing in the game, hmm?)

And now that this post is over, let me tell you in true ESPN fashion that BYU won, 38-8.

Pretty Kitty

Elliott has a beautiful and enormous cat named Whitey. Whitey is 17 years old, and still doing pretty well. He is humongous! He's also very pretty - short white hair, pink nose, pink ears, green eyes. Not the most social animal in the world, but then what cat is?

Here's a picture of Elliott and Whitey on the couch at his mom's house, where Whitey lives.

Rock on, Stewart

Last night I went to Alex's house for dinner. Alex is a great cook, and has people over from time to time. Last night was mashed potatoes and gravy with some great roast beef. After dinner, we all played Guitar Hero. Usually I don't play that much, but I finally got over myself and actually do not suck at it as much as I thought. I even did pretty good on the "medium" level, instead of playing "easy" like usual.

Alex is really, really good. Below is a picture of he and Danae rocking out to some wickedly hard song. Danae came close to beating him, but Alex pulled it out at the last second.

Sabrina, Brindi and Elliott were there, too - here is a picture of them:

Brindi declined to be photographed.

Christmas

Well, Clark has been letting his feelings known about Christmas things, and I wanted to get something off my chest too. Lots of songs may - or may not - qualify as Christmas songs, and they all get played at Christmas time. Sure, "My Favorite Things" doesn't have anything to do with Christmas at all, but that doesn't prevent Delilah from foisting it on us all the time. But that's not what I want to talk about. My main complaint here is about an actual Christmas song: "The Most Wonderful Time of the Year." Let me show you a sample of the lyrics here:

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year
With the kids jingle belling
And everyone telling you
"Be of good cheer"

It's The Most
Wonderful Time Of The Year
It's the hap -happiest season of all
With
those holiday greetings
and gay happy meetings
When friends come to call
It's the hap - happiest season of all

There'll be parties for hosting
Marshmallows for toasting
And caroling out in the snow
There'll be scary ghost stories
And
tales of the glories
of Christmases long, long ago

It's The Most
Wonderful Time Of The Year
There'll be much mistltoeing
And hearts will be
glowing
When love ones are near

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The
Year
There'll be parties for hosting
Marshmallows for toasting
And caroling out in the snow
There'll be scary ghost stories
And
tales of the glories
of Christmases long, long ago

It's The Most
Wonderful Time Of The Year
There'll be much mistltoeing
And hearts will be
glowing
When love ones are near
It's The Most Wonderful Time
It's
The Most Wonderful Time
It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

By:
Eddie Pola and George Wyle

Now, most of that is just a fun, trite song. But let us revisit the refrain:

There'll be parties for hosting
Marshmallows for toasting
And caroling out in the snow
There'll be scary ghost stories
And
tales of the glories
of Christmases long, long ago

Parties? Check. Marshmallows? Uh, check. Caroling? Check. Scary ghost stories? Ch . . . what?

Hold on a minute here! Who on earth tells scary ghost stories as part of celebrating Christmas? That's Halloween stuff! I know that the Christmas decor arrives in stores earlier than the Halloween stuff these days, but let's not get the two mixed together. Anarchy! Won't anyone think of the children?

Sure, some may argue that A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens is a ghost story. And sure, if you happen to be Scrooge McDuck, then it's a scary story. But it's not actually a scary ghost story. It's a story with ghosts. It's not the same thing. So what were Eddie Pola and George Wyle thinking?! Did they just need a rhyme there? Couldn't come up with anything else that rhymes with "glories?" What gives?

If someone can explain this whole thing to me, that's great. In the mean time, I'm boycotting "The Most Wonderful Time of the Year."

Huzzah huzzah

The famous rental car:

And my FABULOUS NEW CAR!

Gross

You may not be aware, but I recently took a lot of time off work. This time of year they always print up little slips letting you know how much vacation you have to use (or lose) and I always have way too much because work is way too important and I have stuff to do and I can't possibly take a day off . . . yeah, that's not true. But sometimes I feel that way, so I always get to December and have an impossible number of days to take off work. So last week I didn't go. At all. I actually took 6 days off in a row, which gave me a very nice 10-day weekend. Ahhh . . . what could I possibly do with that much time?

Not that much, as it turns out.

Well, not as much as I would have liked. But I did get some stuff done. I got all of our Christmas music on the computer so I have it on my iPod now - 8 hours! That's a lot of Mele Kalikimaka (two versions) and dogs barking Jingle Bells.

I also did my holiday baking. I thought to myself, why not make some cookies? Cookies are fun to make and decorate. I can make cookies for all my friends and everyone will think I'm Martha Stewart and it will be great.

Fast forward ten hours later, when I've cleaned the kitchen twice, baked 8 dozen sugar cookies and 4 dozen fudgy bon bons, made my own frosting (six colors!), and am now sitting at the table, covered in nine kinds of jimmies. I think I built up some serious forearm muscles, creaming all that shortening into all that sugar. Not to mention mixing in the six cups of flour. Hoo boy. I think I won't be baking a gross of cookies all in one shot again until I own a KitchenAid mixer.

Anyway, the cookies all tasted fabulous, even if the ones I frosted at 10:30 at night weren't quite as elaborate or pretty as the ones I frosted at 8:00. The bon bons also weren't as prolific as usual because I cut my finger on the Eagle milk can, and that made shaping the dough quite tricky, I tell you what.

Man, I wish I had a cookie right now.

I also spent a lot of my time off work . . . working. I'm lame. But it was vacation then or nothing, and I also had stuff to do . . . I went to a Project Learning Tree training at the Tracy Aviary, and then it was the National Science Teachers Association convention! Woo! Party time!

Actually, it was. I had lots of fun. Not so often do I get to do such overtly nerdy stuff these days.

I also did get a lot of Christmas shopping and wrapping done, and I'm warning you now that I went off-list for a lot of y'all. I hope you like the stuff. I think you'll like the stuff. Please like the stuff.

Insurance sucks a little less.

Yesterday was a good insurance day. Shocking, I know, but it can happen. Which is not to say that I'm not waiting for the other shoe to drop here, but sometimes you take what you can get.

The day started with a call from Allstate, which is the insurer of the other car involved in the accident. Yeah, I didn't think it was insured either. Apparently the accident was reported to them at the end of November (?!) and they are now getting a hold of me. She asked if I was fine (I am), asked if I went to the doctor (I did), asked if I paid anything out of pocket for it (I didn't), asked if I had to get any prescriptions or anything (I didn't), asked if I had recovered (I have,) asked if I missed any work (I didn't) . . . and then told me she would be mailing me a check for $750 for pain and suffering.

Um, okay. Fine with me! Not a bad way to start the day.

She also asked if my car had been repaired yet. Um, no. Not as such. Nor will it be. "Oh," she says. "How much was the damage? $4000? $6000?" Actually, over $12,000. "Oh my. That's a lot." Yeah, well, Geos can do that when traveling at a high rate of speed.


Then the mail came. In the mail was a check from my insurance company for $120. Why? I have no idea. It just arrived in the mail, on its own. No explanation. Hm. It was too late in the day to call them to ask about it, so now I have that money too.

I did get another piece of mail from them over the weekend, an updated insurance document of some kind that also arrived without explanation. So I have two guesses here. Either they have refunded some of my premium because there has been no car to insure for almost two months, or they are refunding some of my premium because they have dropped my collision coverage. I honestly can't say for sure at this point. So that may not turn out to be as good as first believed, but a check for $120 is a check for $120.

Also, I returned the rental car on Monday. It was costing me $26 per day and Linda offered to let me borrow her car until my new car arrives, so I took her up on it. When I was paying the rental car place, they mentioned that the amount charged to my credit card may actually be smaller than the amount I was signing for, since the insurance company was still talking about picking up more of the tab. Keep your fingers crossed there! Even if they don't, the check from Allstate (which was totally unexpected) will more than cover all of the rental car costs.

Yet more insurance news

I know. We all thought we were done with this. It's turning into some sort of farce here - the car crash that never ends. Allstate insurance called me last week, which was weird. I have insurance from four different companies - car, health, dental, and duck insurance - but none of them are Allstate. Turns out the other car in this whole mess was insured. Huzzah.

Allstate sent me a lovely letter, received on Saturday, letting me know that they had received the claim dated October 21, 2006 and that they wanted to work toward a "quick resolution" to the claim for my convenience. Riiiiiiight. Way to be quick there, folks. They also said that "if" their person was found liable for the accident that they would pay for a rental car until my car could be repaired or replaced. Now, obviously this is a form letter. Well, that or Allstate is even further out of touch with reality than my insurance company is.

Anyway, I hope to possibly angle this into getting Allstate to pay for the days of rental car time I've racked up since my insurance company cut me off over a week ago. Barring that, they are aware that I have also opened a "bodily injury claim" (I went to the doctor once after the accident) and that if I had over $3,000 in medical bills I may be eligible for "pain and suffering" compensation. Perhaps I can be eligible for pain and suffering payment purely because I am still having to deal with this? No? I'm going to call them back tomorrow and see what's going on here.

TSO

What?

What?

I can't hear you. I've gone totally deaf because I forgot to wear my earplugs to a concert. Again. It's not as bad this time as it was after the Aerosmith concert, where my ears were actually still ringing the next day, but wow. That was loud.

Trans Siberian Orchestra was in town yesterday, so the 'rents and Jessica and I all went. We had floor seats, 25th row center. Very nice, even if we did have to sit behind some tall people. The best part was that since we had floor seats, so the light displays were right overhead. Also, they had pyrotechnics at both ends of the floor, so we could feel the heat of the flames at the same time that the snow from the snow machines was melting on our faces. The lasers through the falling snow looked really pretty. Very sparkly. The first half of the show was their Christmas Eve and Other Stories album, and then the second half kicked off with Layla. Most excellent.

Opinion Poll

So the question is this: does Jessica's* hairdo make her look like a lhasa apso? Post your comments below.

*Yes, Jessica knows I am doing this and she's okay with it.

The (hopefully last) insurance update

Victory is mine, victory is mine! Great day in the morning people, victory is mine!

Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land - the insurance check has finally arrived! My old car loan is paid off, and my new loan is pre-approved. In the next week, I should have a brand new car.

Huzzah!

Cold me no likey

Brr! It's freezing here! We're posting single-digit temperatures and it's still November! When I was scraping my car off yesterday, it was only nine degrees. Today we're supposed to get a balmy high of 24.

I like winter and snow and stuff, but this is a bit ridiculous.

By special request

Since I was asked, here's another post on the ongoing saga of my car. [Do you have a topic you'd like to see discussed on this blog? Just let me know!]

I am still driving the rental car - this is day 37, for those of you keeping track at home. "But Suzanne," you may be thinking to yourself, "doesn't your insurance policy only cover a rental car for 25 days?"

Why yes, yes it does.

"Why ever then," you may be thinking now, "are you still driving the stinky little rental car?"

Because the insurance company is extraordinarily slow. That's why. Here's a quick time line of events:

• October 21 - car go smash
• October 23 - I fly home
• October 23 - I get a rental car
• October 31 - repair estimate made
• November 9 - I am notified that the car is totaled
• November 23 - Thanksgiving
• November 28 - the rental car agency calls to ask when they're getting their car back
• November 29 - the insurance agency gets a fax from the credit union, and cuts me a check
• December 1 (fingers crossed) - I will receive a very big check from the insurance company

If the insurance company doesn't pay for all the extra days of the rental car, there will be much yelling.

Hopefully I will have a new car next week! I will post pictures of it as soon as I get it, be sure of that.

Let it snow

Dear residents of Salt Lake County:

Please learn how to drive. I would really appreciate it, as my 16-mile drive to work this morning took me 45 minutes.

Yes, I know it snowed last night. I know the roads are a mess. However, if we could all just use our brains while driving, we could all get to work in one piece and in less than an hour.

It's going to snow again today and tonight, so let's try this tomorrow, but without the 60 accidents on the road at the same time, mmmmkay?

Thanks ever so much,
Suzanne

33-31

Not that I'm rubbing it in, but them's the facts. BYU beat Utah, 33-31, on Saturday. How do I know this? Well, I live in Utah and I'm alive, but also I was at the game! The always wonderful Elliott got me a ticket, and it was so cool. I've had season tickets to BYU games before, and have been to half a dozen Ute games, but never a BYU-Utah game. The atmosphere in the stadium was very amped up - way more than a regular game.

This was the last regular-season game for both teams, and BYU was unbeaten in the conference. BYU are also the conference champions, and ranked 21 in the country at the time. Both teams were already going to bowl games, so all this was for bragging rights.

It was senior day for the U, and we got to our seats just as they were introducing the senior players, last of all Eric Weddle, who is a football genius. Say what you will about the U in the name of rivalry, but Weddle is amazing. He plays defense, offense, special teams . . . he's scored 7 touchdowns (three on defense) and thrown for another. He's pretty awesome. We were sitting in the student section, and when he was introduced the crowed cheered for a very long time. There were also a few stretches in the game when the crowd was chanting his name.

BYU did the haka before the game, which I always enjoy watching. Unfortunately, since we were in the U student section, I could only see it from behind. Also, since we were sitting in the U student section, I had elected to wear green, rather than blue. I like my team, but I also like not getting booed.

BYU started off great in the 1st quarter, going up 14-0, and then the U took over and almost killed me. It was 14-10 at the half, and then suddenly it was 14-24! Officials were all over the place, with weird spots and strange calls (and non-calls). There were missed field goals (Utah), fourth-down conversions (Utah), missed extra points (BYU), penalties taking the game from 3rd-and-29 to 1st-and-5 (BYU possession). Finally, it came down to this: 27-31 with 69 seconds to play. BYU on the 25 yard line. Impending doom. I was hiding behind Elliott. John Beck and BYU went down the field. Pass. Pass. Pass. Scrambles. Time outs.

Finally, they are down near the 10 with 2 seconds left. I am surrounded by very, very excited Ute fans. People start queueing up to storm the field. The ball is snapped.

Beck looks for a receiver. Looks. Looks. Looks. Every Utah defender is covering every BYU guy, except Beck. Time runs out. Beck looks. Looks. A Ute comes running for Beck; he scrambles right. All receivers follow him right. I lose view and watch the BYU section instead. Suddenly, silence. Suddenly, the BYU section goes nuts.

Not every receiver had followed Beck to the right - Harline had stayed at the left end of the end zone, and was wide, wide open. Beck scrambled, then turned and threw left while running right. Harline went down to his knees, and caught the ball right behind the goal line. Touchdown BYU. BYU players storm the field. The U student section stands agape.

It was amazing. I hate close games because they make me nervous - I loves me a good blowout - but I really didn't think we'd win. They had to clear the field again in order to kick the extra point, since they have to attempt an extra point. BYU just took a knee, not wanting to risk the U running it back for a safety and tying the game again. This also meant that they didn't end up winning 34-31. If you have been a BYU fan for a while, you'll know the significance of that.

After storming the field again and celebrating some more, the BYU team all went and did the haka again for the fans (yay!), and we left. Elliott was so crushed by the ending of the game that I took him out to dinner at the Sky Box.

Hiccups

I was trying to look at Melissa and Adam's new pictures on Flickr when I encountered this error message:

Hold your clicks a moment please...

Flickr has the hiccups. We're looking into the problem right now, so please check back later.

A nifty error message, n'est-il pas?

Pumpkins

I love fall, and pumpkins are a major reason why. I also like leaves changing color, and the way the air smells, and the rain-sans-thunder (which does not happen in summer), and kids going back to school. But a big part are the pumpkins, and here's why:

The color orange. I have grown fond of orange in the last few years. Pumpkins are such a lovely color of orange - it stands out against green, against brown, against most things really . . . it looks good with the red and yellow leaves.

Pumpkin treats. I don't like to eat squash. That's a well-known fact. However, if you puree pumpkin or cook it or whatever it is you do to it to turn it into the orange stuff in the can, then it's great. Pumpkin bread, squares, cookies, cake, pie . . . mmm . . . pie. Pumpkin soup is good too, but I think it's really just squash soup with "pumpkin" used as a generic term

Jack-o-Lanterns. I love carving pumpkins. Scraping out the guts, using the little pumpkin saws to make cool pictures and faces, feeding pumpkin seeds to the hamster, it's so much fun. Sadly, I didn't do any jack-o-lanterns this Halloween, but I plan to make up for it next year.

Please help

Someone, please, put me out of my misery here. If you have math skills, please tell me why this works.

How does this work?


YOUR AGE BY DINER & RESTAURANT MATH

This is pretty neat. Don't cheat by scrolling down first! It takes less than a minute. Work this out as you read; be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat. (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1756 . If you haven't, add 1755.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.You should have a three digit number.

The first digit of this was your original number ( i.e., how many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week.) The next two digits are your age! 2006 is the only year it will ever work!

Where did that naughty little hamster go?

Okay, this hamster's name wasn't Charlie (that was 4 hamsters ago, for those of you keeping track at home). His name was Admir, but more commonly he was called Squeaky. Or Hacksaw. Or Monkey. Or Stinky. Or, most recently, Tumor.

Squeaky was a very good hamster, full of all kinds of personality. He enjoyed climbing to the very top of the 3-story cage and chewing on the bars on the top corner (hence, Hacksaw). When you tapped him on the nose to get him to stop, he would shimmy across to the other corner and then climb down (hence, Monkey). Jessica often had to be prompted to clean the cage (hence, Stinky).

Most recently, however, he became afflicted with old age and developed cancer (hence, Tumor). He was approaching his third Christmas, a Blockburger hamster record, when we noticed a marble-sized growth on his chest. It didn't seem to bother him in any way so we gave it little notice until it started growing very, very fast. In the last month the tumor became so large that it became hard for him to walk around, since it dragged between his front legs. He even had a hard time getting food in and out of his cheek pouches, since his left hand was obstructed. He soldiered on, however, and we fed him all the treats he wanted. Ever see a hamster with peanut butter stuck to the roof of its mouth? So cute. He loved peanut butter.

Well, on Sunday night we were sitting down to dinner when we noticed that he was lying underneath his exercise wheel instead of in his snug plastic igloo. Fearing the worst, and getting no response from him, we said our goodbyes and took the cage outside. After dinner, I went to take the rest of his furniture and exercise ball outside when I discovered he was gone. Not gone in the "he's gone, sob!" sense of the word - gone, as in missing. Our dead hamster had wandered off.

Turns out he got cold and went inside his snug little igloo. Not so dead as we had thought.

So Stinky the miracle hamster was brought back inside for a final night in the house, and we all debated having him put to sleep or just waiting it out. It was decided not to take him outside again to let nature take it's course.

The next evening, having seen no activity in the hamster abode and no food touched from the food dish, the cage was opened and the contents of the igloo examined. It was determined at that time that the hamster was actually dead, and mourning commenced anew.

Clint dug a small grave by flashlight, and Hacksaw was laid to rest. We will miss him, although there are some among us who are choosing to wait three days to make sure he's not coming back again before they start to mourn.

It's called denial, and it's often the first step in the grieving process, followed by anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

Sentence diagram

Clark, I think you owe me a dollar.

Quiz time!

What do these items all have in common?

• prayer flags
• sock monkey
• rubber boots
• plush meerkat
• bug collection
• baseball hats
• SpongeBob notepad
• sunblock
• three pair of sunglasses
• four mugs
• a case of chips
• two bird houses
• a candy dish full of the little sponge animals that grow out of the little capsules when you put them in water
• hippo Pez dispenser
• a basket made out of Coke bottle caps
• postcard from Yellowstone
• elephant vase
• naked mole rat life-size model
• sisal plant
• bucket of sidewalk chalk
• crayons
• Spanish-English dictionary
• a sack of National Geographic maps
• Tour de France leaderboard

Bobby

Hey everybody! I have passes to go see an advance screening of Bobby tonight at the Broadway theater. Want to go? I have three extra tickets . . . you know you want to. Just hop a plane over here!

Philosophical musings on blogging

When I started this blog a month ago, I did it mainly out of peer pressure. I really didn't expect to update it as often as I have, and I certainly didn't expect anyone much to read it.

But now I'm updating it pretty regularly, and on days when I can't think of anything to say, I feel like I'm letting people (all three of you) down in some way. And when I post something and people comment, I get way too excited. (Hint!)

So, the question is: why am I blogging? To amuse myself? To amuse you, gentle reader? To keep you informed on the very few events in my life?

I suppose the main reason is to amuse myself. If you are also amused, that is a bonus. I have to admit that I'm very easily amused - wearing mittens for the first time this winter last week, I kept myself entertained for quite a long time. Imagine if those mittens had little googly eyes on them! I'd still be wearing them, and that makes it hard to type.

Someone asked me last week what the point of a blog is. Why would one blog when one could just send an email? Why would you want personal information online?

I think the answer to the first question is this: people don't always care. So yeah, maybe I've just bought a really cool toy and I think it's the greatest thing ever. I want to tell everyone about it. There are going to be a certain number of people I miss on the emailing list, and then there's the ever-present dilemma that maybe you all don't care. (Because, let's face it, it's going to be about 20 minutes from now when I discover something else that I think is the greatest thing ever.) But - eureka! - if I post about it on a blog, you all can read or disregard the message at your leisure, without feeling guilt about not having sent a reply email. It's all the communication with only the fraction of the hassle!

Regarding the second question, "Why could you want personal information online?", I view it like this: this isn't personal information. Can someone steal my bank account by knowing that I enjoy songs by OK Go? No. Is my name or place of business on here anywhere? I don't think so. Is any of this information something that you wouldn't glean from sitting next to me on a bus for 20 minutes? Probably not. So hey, why not post it online? I don't see a problem there. Anything that's personal or sensitive or intended for one person is still going to go in an email.

So anyway, those are my thoughts on the bloggerverse. Make of them what you will.

Or not; that's cool, too.

Tryptophantastic

I got some really good sleep on Saturday night, and I blame the turkey. We had a Thanksgiving dinner at work (sometimes it's easier to have a Thanksgiving party than a Christmas party) and we had TONS of food. Such good, tasty food. And so much of it! I don't know where all the leftovers went - and there must have been tons of them. We had turkey and ham, and I love both. I had seconds on the turkey, and you could tell at the end of dinner that everyone at our table was getting quiet . . . but in a good way, you know? I had so much turkey, I didn't even have dessert. Elliott was falling asleep in his chair. For a work party, it was pretty good. Usually they can be pretty awkward. The staff did end up sitting apart from all the volunteers - as usual - even to the extent of bringing extra chairs over to our table in the corner. It was interesting to see different people eat dinner together who don't usually interact at work. It was a good night. Now, if only blogger would let me put hard returns in here to split this into paragraphs and make it easier to read, then I'd really be on top of the world! I blame AOL.

$18,858.16

Yes, Johnny is no more. Eighteen thousand, eight hundred fifty-eight dollars and sixteen cents is the total amount of the settlement on offer from the insurance company. This is more than I had expected, since the value for my car that we found online was $17,975. So this is nice. I have to sign a bunch of forms, and then they will pay off the rest of my car loan and send me a check for the remainder of the settlement amount.

$12,474.16

Twelve thousand, four hundred seventy-four dollars and sixteen cents. That's the repair estimate on my car. (Now relocated, apparently, by the insurance agency.) To be considered totaled, the repair cost needs to be 70% of the value of the car. According to what I've found online, my car has a retail value of $17,900 give or take, which means it's close. Very close. The insurance company should be letting me know tomorrow what they think the value of the car is, but it looks like it's totaled.

Daylight Saving

I'm in a bit of a mood today, and I blame the weather. It's raining and cold, which is to be expected for November. I even like rain. So the weather in and of itself is not so bad, but it's so dark all the time! Daylight Saving time ends in October, which usually elicits no complaints from me because it means that day I can sleep in for an hour. However, this year it's really thrown me for a loop. It's dark when I get up, it gets dark at about 4:00 . . . I've been leaving work pretty early all week (though still not technically early - just not horribly late like I normally do) because I look out the window at 4:30 and think it's 6:00 so I pack up to go home.

It's just hard to be cheery when it's dark all the time! And it's overcast all week . . . sigh. I guess it's time to adjust to winter.

OK Go

Listen to the OK Go album "Oh No." Buy it on iTunes (It's only $6.99 for the whole album!). I like the songs "Invincible" and "Here it Goes Again" the best.

Even better, go to YouTube and watch the video for "Here it Goes Again." I'm sure you have already, but it's worth watching twice. It's "on demand" on Comcast right now, too.

Vegetables

My brother Clark recently posted on his blog about the finicky eating habits of Shannon and myself in regard to vegetables. I have been known to be a picky eater. I am still a picky eater, though slowly I am growing out of some of my food phobias.

One help in this regard has been peer pressure. I never would have eaten fried coconut grouper with pepper jelly, (MMM!) were it not for peer pressure. Another reason I have tried more foods in the last few years is my vacation rule: you do things on vacation that you would not normally do at home. I'm not talking about things on the level of "Spring break! Woo!" or, you know, skydiving in Namibia, but little things. Ordering something off the menu that you wouldn't normally order. Trying something you wouldn't normally try. This policy had led to my eating the following items:

• the aforementioned grouper
• Maryland! crab cakes
• crocodile (a definite must-not for your next tasting menu)
• veal sausage
• sukuma wiki
• okra
• calamari
• pickled mushroom
• camel
• the schmutz you dip the calamari in (I think they would call it aioli in a restaurant)
• eggplant
• goat
• a sip of red wine (tastes like burning)

Most of the items on that list are very tasty. Crocodile, the mushroom, goat, wine and eggplant are not. To me. Please, sample them yourself! (Except the crocodile. Trust me.)

Anyway, the main reason I have for disliking foods is the texture. I have mouth texture issues. I know I'm not alone in this. My mouth doesn't like squishy things very much. No slimy things. The list of things I will not eat because of texture includes:

• squashes (except pureed in soup form)
• tomatoes* (all right in sauce and salsa form)
• avocado (except in smashed-up guacamole form)
• clams or clam chowder
• canned peas
• sukuma wiki
• pickled mushrooms
• mushrooms or fungus of any kind, really
• things that look like they may be smooshy or slimy (i.e. oysters, which I have never tried)

*Tomatoes, I have developed a laissez-faire attitude toward. I will pick around them in salads, but I will eat them in sandwiches. However, if a tomato falls out of a sandwich, I will not retrieve it. Anyone I cook for should not expect to find tomato in the salad. Or sandwich.

Foods I will not eat just because I don't like them:

• blue cheese
• Brussels sprouts
• green Jell-o
• cauliflower

This is not a comprehensive list.

Happy Halloween!

Boo! I like Halloween. It seems like it's the only holiday that's purely fun. Sure, a long time ago it had religious meanings, All Hallow's Eve and all that, but nowadays it's just about costumes and candy. Even Christmas, for all we moan about it becoming commercial, is still a religious holiday. Not so with Halloween! No guilt here, except from candy overdoses. Just fun! It's the one time a year I can wear a princess skirt and a flapper wig at the same time without anyone else thinking I'm crazy.

The ongoing saga of Johnny

I was so hoping that by the time Halloween rolled around, I would have definitive answers about my current transportation situation. Alas, 'tis not to be.

I did go to the doctor yesterday, since I still am achy in many places from the car crash. My pain is a two out of ten, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, and *gasp!* SEVEN! Ouch. There's a very tender spot on my ribs, right where my door handle apparently smacked me. Yow. They didn't do any x-rays because even if the ribs are broken or cracked, there's nothing they can do about it. So I am going to tell everyone I have cracked ribs. Why not? The doctor wanted to put me on an anti-inflammatory, but it turns out that I'm allergic to all of them. So it's just me and my good friend Tylenol until these aches and pains go away. They nearly have; every time the doctor asked me how much something hurt, I said "It hurt much more when I made the appointment . . . "

Anyway, back to Johnny. I called the insurance people on Friday, but they hadn't appraised the car yet (or whatever it is they do). So I called back on Monday and asked for an update. Apparently they have towed the car from the tow yard to their storage yard, and have since then moved the car from that place to another place . . . or it may be somewhere in transit between place one and place two.

Yeah. I think they lost my car.

Which bodes well for it being totaled, right? I mean, can't fix it if you can't find it, right? Right?

I couldn't get her to tell me where place one and place two even are (Colorado Springs? Denver?) so it remains a mystery. Time to call in Shaggy and Scooby.

Scary

Okay, so anyone who has known me for more than about a week knows that I am arachnophobic. I hate spiders. I love insects. I think bugs are cool. They're great! I will pick them up and let them crawl all over me.

But I hate spiders. Hate. Haaate. Ick.

On Wednesday, I was at work talking to Chris about how uptight I have been for the last few days. I had to tell the story of my car accident about 20 times that day, and I was very tense - almost shaky - all day. Couldn't relax. While I was talking to her about this, I was preparing to take some Tylenol (my muscles are sore from being clenched for 4 days). We have a drinking fountain in the office, but it's easier to take pills with a cup, so I opened our box of paper cups and got one out. I was standing there, talking to Chris, for about 2-3 minutes with the cup in my hand, when I looked down into the cup before filling it with water. There, in the bottom of the cup, was a HUMONGOUS SPIDER. It was large! It filled the entire bottom of the cup! It looked just like the hobo spiders that have been terrorizing me all over the zoo!

With a shout, I flung the cup away (at Chris, sorry!) and the spider hit the floor. Calm as you please, Chris squashed it to bits while I curled up in the fetal position and hyperventilated a bit. We didn't care to find out whether it was a brown garden spider, or a wolf spider, or a hobo spider - Chris just scraped it off the carpet with the cup and threw it away. After recovering for a moment, I took my Tylenol by using the drinking fountain. No cups for me, thank you very much.

And what's this button for? And what's this button do? And what . . .

So, on the flight home from Denver, I sat in front of a very nice family. A mom, a 13-year-old(ish) girl, and a 9-year-old(ish) girl. They were on their way to California for a vacation, and this was the first airplane ride for either of the two girls. The older one was pretty cool about it, choosing to observe others and figure things out on her own, but the younger girl was really, really excited to be there and had to know everything about everything and apparently had neither watched TV nor movies nor even heard of airplanes before, judging from the question-and-answer session that was going on behind me.

"Is this the seat belt? Do I have to wear it? What seat belt sign? So it goes on and off? But can I stand up? And what's this button? And this one? Volume for what? So it's like a radio? How do I make the seat go back? Like this? Why can't I right now? Oh, did I hit your knees? I'm sorry! What do they mean, air? How do you turn on air? I can't reach. It's cold! A tray! Cool! For like, your drink? Why can't I right now? What safety video? I don't want to watch a safety video. Oh, I do? Air masks? Where do the air masks fall out? What light? I can turn on a light? What if I don't want a light? Why did the other lights go out? She said they're turning off the lights. Did we take off? Oh, we're still not in the air? How will I know when we ta . . . oh. Wow. So I can take my seat belt off now? Yay! Why do I have to put it back on? What's turbulence? I don't feel . . . oh! Why is it bumpy?"

It was cute, in a slightly irritating sort of way. Of course, I was slightly irritated anyway because I was tired and my reading light and the light for the empty seat next to me both weren't working.

She settled down for most of the flight, played Go Fish for a while, and then things got fun again as we were approaching Salt Lake. The mom kept telling the girls that they could see the temple from the air, but didn't have a very good feel for Utah geography, as she thought we would be flying over the Great Salt Lake and that you could see the (Salt Lake) temple from Provo. The older girl was in the window seat, as was I, so as we got lower over the Salt Lake valley I started pointing out landmarks to her and helping her to spot the temple downtown. As you can imagine, this made everyone on the row behind me very happy. They were nothing if not genuinely excited.

As we got very low over the runway, the younger girl began asking questions again, including whether or not we were on the ground yet. I turned around and said, "trust me. You'll know."

She was just about to ask how she'd know, when we hit the runway with the usual thump. It actually was a nice landing. She, caught off guard by it, gave a little scream which made most of the passengers around her laugh. It was pretty funny. "I didn't think it would be like that!"

They were very nice girls and I hope they are having lots of fun in California.

Getting home

Ah, home again. I actually have been home for a few days, but I think I should probably explain how I got here. Since my car is now, essentially, a very expensive tricyle, I was in need of assistance in getting home. AAA has been helpful in the whole insurance area thus far, and were willing to get me a rental car with which to drive home, but I really wasn't looking forward to the 10-hour drive. I loved the drive on the way out, but wasn't feeling good about it any longer - particularly in a rental car. Lots of different scenarios were discussed - Clark and Shannon driving me as far as Green River, my flying from Colorado Springs, etc. - but I ended up finding a $114 flight from Denver to Salt Lake. Since I'd practically be spending that much on gas to drive home (grr, Utah gas prices!) I decided to fly.

Carrie and Clint were very kind and drove me all the way to Denver International Airport - which is practially in Kansas, I think - after Lauren's doctor appointment in Colorado Springs. A quick 62-minute flight later, I was back in Utah. Ahhhhhhh. I now have a rental car, a tiny little Toyota Corolla (from Florida!? This after every car company claimed not to do one-way rentals) which was a total picnic to drive home in last night's blizzard, believe you me.

Thank you very much to Clark and Shannon and Clint and Carrie and Brenda and everyone who helped me out in getting out of Colorado sane and in one piece.

Colorado

9:40 AM, October 20, 2006. Elliott asks the question, "Colorado can't be that desolate, can it?"

9:45 AM, October 20, 2006. I pull the car over and take a picture.

Look at the BABY, Elaine. Come look at the BABY!

I thought since the whole reason I went to Colorado was to visit my sister and her family, maybe I should post a picture of that. It's a bit cheerier than the last few pictures.

Here's little Lauren, and her car-crashingest auntie.

Poor Johnny

This is Johnny on Saturday afternoon at Bishop's Castle.

This is Johnny four hours later, just outside Canon City.

Colorado (Mis)Adventure

This afternoon we didn't have any plans, so Carrie, Clark, Shannon and I all got in my car to go to Florence and visit all of the antique shops (of which there are about 12). I drove along highway 115 from Canon City to Florence and was approaching a bend in the road when a little blue Geo came whipping around the corner, driving in the wrong lane on the two-lane road. My lane.

I was driving kind of slow because I'm not familiar with the area, but she didn't react very quickly. She looked up and saw us, but didn't move over. I slammed on my brakes and tried to pull over onto the shoulder, but she swerved too late and she hit us. All down the driver's side. My entire rear wheel is gone. Gone.

No one was hurt, in our car or hers. The car behind us stopped and waited for police to come, as witnesses to the accident. All of the debris and the spot of impact were all in my lane, so there is no doubt as to who was at fault here.

What remains is that I am in Colorado and my car has essentially been totalled (no official word on that yet) and I have to get home. I do have all my insurance information here with me, and they will reimburse $25 per day for a rental car, so it looks like I will be renting a car to drive home on Monday.

Poor Johnny! My wonderful, beautiful CR-V. I made a payment on it Monday - I had less than 10 months before he was paid off. I just rotated the tires and changed the oil on Monday . . . and now he's gone. I can't see how he's not totalled. Clint drove me to the tow yard and I cleaned him out, got all my possessions - my CDs, my mittens, my Maasai wedding necklace that hung from the rear-view mirror, my maps, and my flashlight. Poor, poor Johnny.

My neck is a little sore and the adrenalin has worn off now. I'm so bummed. When it first happened, all I could do was sob. I hyperventilated and cried until the EMTs came. I think I kept my foot pressed down on the brake for about 10 minutes after I actually came to a stop. I just cried and cried. My poor car, my poor car, it's the only thing I own, really.

I will have pictures up soon, when I can.

Warning!

Warning!
Correctional facility
do not pick up hitchhikers.

This is an actual road sign in Colorado. It struck me as odd.

While it is a good idea to warn travelers against picking up hitchhikers near the prison, I worry about the implications of this sign. Did they have a lot of problems with inmates getting away? Are escapes so common that it's a regular occurrence for escapees to be picked up by cars driving by?

One of Two

So Clark and Shannon and I are in Colorado, visiting Carrie and Clint and their new baby, Lauren. It's lots of fun so far. It was a lot of driving (but I like driving) and some dinky hotels (but I like hotels) but YAY! for babies so we're doing good.

We went out to dinner the first night we were in town, to a local steak place. I so love a nice steak, cooked medium-rare. My order came more medium than rare, but it was still tasty, so that was all right.

When we went in to be seated, the host asked us how many people were in our group. Everyone else said five, and I said six. Hm. Well, six with the baby, but she doesn't really count since she's two months old. So what was I thinking of? Clark and Shannon, Carrie and Clint, me and . . . oh. Just me. Suppose in the last few months I've become used to going places with Elliott and being part of a duo. Being just me is not a problem, but it kind of caught me off guard that I was assuming that I was one of a couple. Particularly since, that night, I wasn't.

It's nice to be one of two.

Traveling

I like traveling. I like going to places I haven't been before. I like getting away from home and seeing different things that I have seen before. I like flying on planes, and driving in the car. I like vacations.

I like airports. Sure, when you go to Kenya and it's an airport followed by an eight-hour flight, followed by another airport and another eight-hour flight, followed by an airport and a three-hour flight and one more airport . . . well, then I don't airports so much. Don't like airplanes so much either, to the point that if swimming home from Greenland were just a little more feasible, I'd jump out of the plane on that second eight-hour flight.

But I digress. I do like to travel.

When I go on vacation, I pack those little travel-size toiletries. They're fun. I always use the same shampoo when I travel, too. It's a shampoo I don't use at home, so when I'm on vacation my hair smells pretty and everything smells like vacation.

Technology

Wow, isn't technology great? We have toasters, and cars, and iPods, and transistor radios, and drill presses, and printing presses, and Diet Coke, and airplanes, and space shuttles. Cool stuff.

And - this is the most amazing part - we also have spellchecker. On this very blog! I just discovered this. How cool is that?

Needless to say, I'm going back and editing my previous posts.

I have the Ebola virus.

It's true. I have Ebola. I got it at the Gateway - the Clark Planetarium, to be precise - and I'm sitting here in my office, staring Ebola in the face. It's a deceptively kind face, not the kind of face you'd expect to find on a virus that kills 50-90% of all those who catch it. Sure, you think it's cute and fuzzy now, but wait 2-20 days and then you'll start bleeding out of unpleasant places and your liver will melt and you kind of turn into soup and die. Then you'll be rethinking your new-found relationship with the Ebola virus.

Sure, right now, you think it's just a fever. "Maybe I have the flu," you think. "Surely this couldn't be something silly like a hemorrhagic fever from equatorial Africa. Surely?" And then - BAM! - out you go. Heading to the big equatorial Africa in the sky.

Or, you recover. You never know. And don't worry about hospitals - they can't help you! Oh, no. Better to stay home. Most cases are nosocomial. That means transmitted through a hospital.

"But wait!" You say. "I am not going to an equatorial African hospital! Surely, surely, they can help me!"

No.

So anyway, I have Ebola. I think it'll be okay. I'm going on vacation today. I've got stuff to do!


For more information, please go to http://www.giantmicrobes.com/.

Testing, testing . . . is this thing on?

Well, eventually we all succumb to fads and trends. Seems like all the cool kids lately have a blog, and even if there are only two people in the world who will bother reading this, it seems like a good idea. If nothing else, I can put stuff out on the interweb and feel that I've contributed to something.

So there you have it.